


Mixtape (It Was You I Was Thinking Of)

by dinkitandrhinkit



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: As you do, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, M/M, Making a sappy mixtape to confess your love, Merle Haggard - Freeform, Pining Rhett, teen rhink, young rhink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2019-04-06 07:36:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14052075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinkitandrhinkit/pseuds/dinkitandrhinkit
Summary: Rhett made Link a lot of mixtapes of Merle. But there's one that Link never listened to. Now, twenty years later, he finds the tape and gets a surprise.





	Mixtape (It Was You I Was Thinking Of)

Sue was moving again and even through the many, many years and moves, she still had some of Link's stuff, cluttering up the place. It also just so happened that the families were in town for the holidays. That was how Link found himself on an unseasonably warm Sunday afternoon, trapped in the garage, sifting through the multitudes of boxes, while his wife and children were out having fun.  
  
But he wasn't bitter about it or anything.  
  
It was standard stuff. Old clothes, trophies and mementos only parents would keep. Until he hit paydirt. A handful of mixtapes that Rhett made him back in high school. There were several with multiple artists and genres, but by far the most common were Merle playlists.  
  
Link smiled at each cover, handwritten by a younger version of his best friend. Each tape had a title and tracklisting. Some Link remembered playing as they drove around, some he played as they talked about anything and everything in their teenage bedrooms. It brought back so many memories that he was almost bowled over by it.  
  
Until he found The One. The One he'd never played. It'd sat in his underwear drawer and he'd never dared to pull it out. Until now.  
  
It was simply titled 'Merle's Love Songs'. No witty title, no extra notes on the sleeve. Just the track listing, in Rhett's messy scrawl. 

 

_Someday We'll Look Back_  
_Slowly but Surely_  
_Forever and Ever_  
_Too Used To Being With You_  
_I'll Take a Chance_  
_I'll Look Over You_  
_Look Over Me_  
_There I've Said It Again_  
_All of Me Belongs to You_  
_Always Wanting You_  
_Because You Can't Be Mine_  
_My Carolina Sunshine Girl_  
_Remember Me (I'm the One Who Loves You)_  
_Come On Into My Arms_  
_My Love For You_  
_You'll Always Be Special to Me_  
_There Won't Be Another Now_

 

He vividly remembered the day, back in high school, Rhett handed him two new tapes. One that'd become a roadtrip classic and this one.  
  
Link wanted to put it down, shut it away again and never think about it, but it'd been decades. He'd dealt with his issues and maybe it'd make a good story for the show, finding the hidden tapes of teenage heartache. What's the worst that could happen?  
  
He grabbed his mother's walkman that somehow miraculously still worked in the 21st century and laid on the spare bed. He wouldn't let himself dwell on any unwanted feelings. This was a simple experiment and nothing more.  
  
The tracks played and Link lost himself in the familiar voice and guitar. Merle had been the soundtrack of so many moments of their lives.  
  
But under that was the yearning. Merle's voice spoke of heartbreak and desire and wanting what he couldn't have. Link was suddenly glad he'd never listened to it back then. He could hardly handle it at 40, how would he have handled it at 17?  
  
Each song broke his heart in a new way. But still, he listened.  
  
He drifted off, finding himself between sleep and awake, rising and falling with the rhythm of each song. Until the music stopped. It was a shorter tape than usual. He made no move to get up or turn the tape off. It'd switch itself off when it hit the end, so he just laid there, a storm of feelings.  
  
"Hey Link," A familiar voice spoke. He opened his eyes and looked around the room, but he was still alone. He'd known it before he opened his eyes, because as much as the voice was the one he heard almost all day, every day, this version of it was one he hadn't heard in a long time. This was undoubtedly an 18 year old Rhett, recording himself on the end of this mixtape, something Link was fairly certain he'd never done on any other tape.  
  
"I'm hopin' that maybe you never hear this. Or maybe I'm hopin' you do. I dunno, I'm probably not even gonna give this to you," Rhett let out a frustrated sigh at himself and Link could easily picture him, young and annoyed. Adolescence hadn't been an easy time for either of them, but Rhett especially had struggled. He'd been too tall, too shy, too moody.  
  
Link almost switched it off. There was something in Rhett's voice that had Link scared.  
  
But the temptation was too great. So he listened on.  
  
"I dunno how to say this. I'm gonna tell ya this tape was for some girl that I been crushin' on," And he had. The thought had caused a stab in teen Link's heart and while he'd teased and needled as Rhett handed it over, Rhett didn't tell him who it was that'd inspired it and Link never asked again, couldn't bear to.  
  
"But it's not. Gosh, Link." His accent was so much stronger back then and even though Link was at home, in his mother's spare room, it made him homesick.

"It's for you. I'm in love with you, bo."  
  
He'd started crying and Link wanted to reach through time and hold him. Then the words sunk in. He was in love with him?  
  
"I know you don't feel the same. And it's OK. Just pretend you never heard this and we can forget this ever happened. We can just be friends. I promise I'll never bring it up again. I just... I love you, Link."  
  
And he hadn't brought it up. Two decades and he hadn't said a word. Suddenly, Link's heart was racing.  
  
In a panic, he remembered a seemingly inconsequential conversation from those days.  
  
_"Man, you listen to those new tapes I gave you yet?" Rhett had asked, randomly one day._  
  
_"Yeah, course," Link had lied. He had listened to the road trip one, but not the love song one. But he hadn't wanted to tell him why, so he'd lied to him. It was easier this way._  
  
_"You listened all the way through?" Rhett seemed oddly insistent, but teen Rhett was full of a lot of bizarre emotions. Link had shrugged it off._  
  
_"Yeah. They're real good, but I like the road trip one better. The love song one is too sappy and romantic, brother."_  
  
Link had ended the conversation there with an awkward laugh and Rhett had let him.  
  
Over two decades. For over two decades Rhett had thought he didn't love him back. For over two decades he'd acted as if nothing had happened. For over two decades they'd missed their chance.  
  
Link's mind cast back to those days. Rhett had pulled away from him for a few months, which a teenage Link had just chalked up to hormones and that was the time Rhett had thrown himself into dating as many girls as possible.  
  
Suddenly, Link's entire life made a lot more sense and yet everything felt upside down.  
  
He wanted to run all the way across Fuquay-Varina to where he knew Rhett was spending the holidays with this family. Because suddenly, this seemed urgent, despite the fact he'd lived in ignorance for two whole decades.  
  
But he couldn't.  
  
What would he say? What could he say? "Hi Rhett, I finally got your love letter and I want you to know that I love you too"? He wanted to scream "why didn't you say anything?". But he had. He'd said more than Link ever had and it made him mad.  
  
There was nothing he could do, nothing he could say to erase the fact that they'd missed their chance. It was too late. They'd moved on.  
  
He wanted to scream or cry. But instead he sat there, alone in his mother's house, staring off into space, feeling like the confused teen he should've been when he first heard the message. By the time he heard the front door open, the sun had started to set and he must be been sat there for at least an hour.  
  
He needed to let it go. There was no use dwelling, when he had the smiling faces of his wife and children to greet him and tell him all about their days.  
  
*****  
  
But of course Link couldn't let sleeping dogs lie. He needed to let Rhett know that he'd heard his message. It was stupid and selfish, but he couldn't be beside him every day and not let him know. He'd loved him for years and he deserved to know he hadn't suffered alone.  
  
The first day back after break, Link walked into their office.  
  
"Guess what I found in mom's garage?" He started. He wanted to feel his way into the conversation. He needed to tread carefully.  
  
"What?" Rhett replied, not looking up, or otherwise acknowledging Link's entrance. He was seemingly entirely disinterested.  
  
"Some of the mixtapes you made me back in high school. Do you remember?" He asked and watched Rhett for any sign of a tell.  
  
There was no visual reaction, but his tone was slightly hesitant when he said, "Yeah. I remember." The hesitation was so slight that anyone but Link would be missed it.  
  
"We should talk about it."  
  
"We've talked about them before on the show, but if you've found something else or some other angle to talk about, I'm sure we can work it in somewhere," Rhett said, apparently still unaffected.  
  
"No, I mean we should talk about it. You and me, we should talk about it."  
  
Link placed the Love Songs tape beside Rhett's laptop and watched him freeze.  
  
"No."  
  
"We need to, Rhett." 

He was trying to stay firm here. So much for treading lightly. It's not like Link was known for being subtle anyway.  
  
"No. You didn't want to talk about it then, but you wanna talk about it now? It's dead, Link, let it go."  
  
He stood up and made to leave, but Link couldn't let him just walk away.  
  
"I didn't know!" He yelled, desperate to make him stay. It felt like if he walked away now, every trace of his teenage confession would be lost and Link would be forced to go back to how things were. He didn't know if he could stand it.  
  
"What do you mean you didn't know?" Rhett was watching him, weary but willing to listen. It was a testament to how much he trusted Link that he wasn't already gone.  
  
"I mean I never heard it before last week. I never listened to the dang tape before."  
  
Link was exasperated. He hadn't wanted to resort to yelling at each other, but he should've known that Rhett wouldn't exactly be receptive to the conversation.  
  
"But I asked you. Back then. I asked you if you listened to it."  
  
He didn't seem angry or defensive, which Link took as a good sign. For now. Instead he seemed shocked and confused and that was fine. Link shocked and confused him pretty often. This was a dynamic he could work with.  
  
"I lied," He shrugged.  
  
"Why?" Rhett asked. It was an open and genuine question, without any hint of accusation.  
  
"I couldn't bring myself to listen to it. Not even for a second."  
  
He couldn't bring himself to just confess the reasons why either, but Rhett wasn't willing to be that patient.  
  
"Why?" He asked again, more forcefully this time.  
  
"Because I thought you were in love with some girl and I couldn't bear hearing Merle pouring his heart out and knowing you were thinking about a random girl."  
  
"Why?" Rhett was starting to sound like a broken record, but the more he pushed, the more Link had to reveal. Unless he decided to run away. But as the one who'd instigated the whole thing, he had an obligation to see it through. And Rhett wouldn't put up with his bullshit or let him walk away.  
  
"Because I was in love with you." Link stopped breathing, watching carefully as Rhett digested that.

  
"Huh," He said and sat back at his desk. He went back to typing an email reply, leaving Link stranded alone in the middle of their office with no conclusion.  
  
"That's it?" He felt adrift.  
  
"What do you want me to say?" He swivelled his chair around for round 2.  
  
"When did you know? How long did it take you to move on? How did you do it?"  
  
Rhett sighed.  
  
"I knew when we were 11."  
  
"That long?" That seemed an impossibly long time. So long it took Link's breath away.  
  
"That long," He nodded.  
  
"How did you forget it?"  
  
"I dunno," Rhett shrugged. He wasn't meeting Link's eyes and Link knew it meant there was more that he wasn't saying. Sometimes knowing each other as well as they did wasn't an advantage.  
  
"How can you not know?" He pushed. If Rhett had a solution, he wanted to know. Because after decades of trying everything he could, he still hadn't managed to move on or forget.  
  
"Because I never did, you idiot."

Everything stopped at Rhett's outburst.

  
"But you never said anything," Link said, tentatively. He took a small step towards Rhett but thought better of it, deciding not to crowd him.  
  
"Because I thought you listened to the tape and you rejected me. Why would I put myself out there again when I'd already been rejected? It's not like you were jumping at the chance to confess your undying love to me either."  
  
Now Rhett was angry and Link didn't blame him. It wasn't fair to put that all on him. As much as he wanted to argue, as frustrated as he was, he couldn't. Rhett didn't deserve that.  
  
He took a deep breath and sighed sadly, de-escalating the fight before it could get worse.  
  
"We missed our chance, didn't we?"  
  
"Yeah, we did. This doesn't change anything. We've both moved on, right?" Rhett asked, eyes locked on Link's, silently begging him for closure. Maybe this was what they both needed to leave those old feelings behind for good.  
  
"Right," He nodded. They stood there, staring at each other, both feeling for the first time the pain they'd put the other through, and they'd put themselves through.  
  
"You're not still in love with me, right?" Link asked.  
  
Rhett shot him a warning look, "Link..." he growled.

"Come on, man. It's just a question."  
  
It wasn't just a question. They both knew it wasn't just a question. They were on shaky ground and Link was trying to shake it up even more.  
  
"You're my best friend," Rhett began.  
  
"That's a damn cop out," Link interrupted him.  
  
"Of course I love you," Rhett finished with a glare.  
  
"That's not what I meant and you know it."  
  
Link was pushing all his buttons.  
  
Rhett sighed again and put his head in his hands, slumped in his chair. But he didn't reply. So Link answered his own question.  
  
"I'm in love with you and I always have been. I think I always will," Link whispered. In the silence of the office, he knew that Rhett would hear it.  
  
Rhett looked up at him, tears in his eyes. Link wasn't the most emotionally expressive man in the world. But for once, he let the words flow out of him.  
  
"I tried to stop. For years, I tried. I don't care that it's 20 years too late. I don't care that you've moved on. I don't care. I love you. I don't care if you don't feel the same, because I can't ever stop."  
  
Rhett's tears fell and Link wanted to comfort him more than anything. But he couldn't. Rhett needed to make his own decision here. Link had made his the second he'd heard a terrified, 18 year old confess his love for the boy he'd spent two thirds of his life calling his friend.  
  
It wasn't even really a choice.  
  
Rhett stood and approached Link carefully. He'd stopped crying, but the tear tracks still shone on his face as he moved across the room.  
  
Link stood his ground and watched as Rhett got closer. He was fairly certain Rhett wouldn't hit him, but he also wasn't giving any signs on what exactly he had planned.  
  
"Link, you're the dumbest smart person I've ever met," Rhett laughed softly and before Link could tell him to go to hell, Rhett had kissed him.  
  
Any retort died on his tongue as it met Rhett's.  
  
"I've loved you for almost as long as I can remember. I never stopped and I never will," Rhett replied between kisses.  
  
Link could hear the scared teen lurking in there still, so he wrapped his arms around him and kissed him again, like he'd always dreamed, quieting their nerves and helping to heal the years of longing and hurt.  
  
*****

Later that night, entangled in each other, Rhett played his guitar, singing the playlist he'd prepared for Link decades before.  
  
Before playing the final song, he paused for a kiss and said, "In the words of Merle, there may be another morning, but there won't be another now." 

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to listen to the Merle playlist, but if it's a bit too much, at least look up You'll Always Be Special to Me and There Won't Be Another Now. They're so perfect for how Rhett would've been feeling. If you listen to There Won't Be Another Now and think of Rhink, I swear, it works too well. 
> 
> Title taken from the Jack's Mannequin song Mixtape.


End file.
